My everyday experience has made a single thing clear to me: people have the wrong idea about forgiveness. There are various theories surrounding this crucial act, such as the idea that too much of it will lead you to being stepped on constantly in life, as well as the oh so famous saying which implies that forgiving is equivalent to forgetting. Well, being the firm advocate for forgiveness that I am, I’m here to set the record straight, for your sake. Below, I will list a few facts about forgiveness which, whether you hold the beliefs above or not, should make it easier for you to pardon those difficult people in life.
Forgiveness = Happiness
A man wiser than I once said, “Forgiving someone is like releasing a prisoner, and then finding out that prisoner was you all along.” This quote captures the entire idea to be expressed in this point. Often times, hating somebody because of what they did to you keeps you in constant distress, while not having any effect whatsoever on the other party. When you allow yourself to let go of the past, you will take away any hold that people have on you, and will therefore feel as if a weight was lifted from your mind, allowing you to enjoy the present rather than obsessing or brooding over the past.
Forgiveness is NOT a favor
Many people believe that forgiveness is something that you do for other people, allowing them back into your life, or acting like they never did anything to upset you in the first place. Many times, we believe that someone isn’t worthy of our forgiveness. True forgiveness, however, is something that you do for yourself. When you forgive someone, you let go of what they did in the sense that you no longer think about it day and night, as well as you stop allowing the thought of their transgression to tear you down. Forgiveness is simply making peace with the past, which again, allows you to better enjoy the present. Honestly, you don’t even need to tell someone you forgive them, nor do you need to allow those people that have wronged you back into your life. The most important person to benefit from your forgiveness, more than anyone else, should always be you.
Hopefully, those two points were enough to convince most of you that forgiveness is freedom for yourself, and yourself alone. Whether they were or not, there’s a lot more to be said on the topic! If you’d like me to follow up with an article on self-forgiveness, or even more points explaining forgiveness in general, just let me know in the comments.
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It's always been my belief that it's a blessing to be a blessing, and that's why I write, to do whatever I can to brighten a person's day.